The Summer of Love...

Summer of 1999. That was supposed to be my summer. First time alone for two months without a care in the world. It had been years since I was alone for so long. I became a mom at a young age. The kid begged to go away with his dad for 2 months that summer... I obliged.  Quickly the summer became everything. The space and time where I could be whatever I wanted to be.

But it became my summer of love...

 We met and it was never meant to happen. That night I had a date with another boy.  A boy that held much promise since he was kind and good looking. As I was to walk out the door to meet the "date" he (now husband) placed a toe ring on my bare feet right after we met. Not used to wearing a toe ring all I could do during my "date" was stare at my feet and think about the boy I had just left behind. The ring felt as if it held some type of magnetic force and my toes kept tingling. Right there on my second toe I had been chained.

Needless to say my "date" with the Latin boy lasted 60 minutes they were timed by my watch and a few beats from Fatboy Slim. I ran back almost breathless to find him where I had just left him. Right there I proclaimed with a  big smile I am back. That was fast- he replied. Still catching my breath all I could do was smile. A week after that fateful meeting we became a family. We ignored the whispers, the talks and fourteen years later here we are...

On May 9th my husband and I celebrated our 14th anniversary. He walked me to a Savannah bridge where the Parisian custom of locking a lock and throwing away the key lives. We couldn't make it to Paris but somewhere in time in another dimension we did. In that moment Savannah became foreign to me. No longer chained we are now locked.

Mother's Day.

I have three kids but the one in the middle stole my heart on Mother's Day. Maybe because of her age . Maybe because she loves me. She gave me the best Mother's Day a kid could have given. Breakfast in bed. hugs and kisses and a stage performance.

On Instagram LtoR 1.The Show Oklahoma! 2. Breakfast 3. Oklahoma! 4.Baby M. and Me. 5. Sunflower 6.Thespian.

Hoping your weekend was sweet... Happy new week friends.

February 13th...

There are flowers on my bedsheets and polka dots on my silky gown.
There is cigarette smoke dancing with the nag champa frolicking in the pink morning light.
There are many bubbles on our equally pink drink and we look at each other and we smile.

We smile because we are not supposed to be having this much fun after 14 years.
We smile because we are not supposed to lust after each other as much.
We smile because we are not supposed to be celebrating Valentines day... today is the 13th.

There are berries and a lace window curtain dancing in the air.
There is a girl thinking of writing poetry so she scribbles words on her thigh.
There are neighbors walking their dogs unaware of what had just happened and we smile.

 Happy Valentines Day!

Chaos Theory...

Maybe I should start doing these blog posts bit by bit. I get overwhelmed with life and writing and I hate being consumed in just one dimension or facet of my life. So I move around.  Anyone that knows me "in real life" says I am random. We can be talking about one thing but I have so much to say that I move on... To another conversation.... One that we probably had a month ago but we are back to it... I, then will move us to another conversation to one that we had the month prior to that causing this randomness. Scientist call these patterns the Chaos theory so I tell myself  it is not so random.

About Chaos Theory
Today is our wedding anniversary.
We said we do while I was 13 days away from the birth of our first daughter.
I figured anyone who wishes to marry me looking the way I did must be in love or crazy.
Neither reason sounded dull so I said I do.
While we were broke and stupid, scared and nervous.
We said we do. While I wore a maternity shirt from Kmart and a pair of flip flops from Forever 21.

I said... I do.

We exchanged silver bands that were made for us by a lapidary man. A man that charged us 12 dollars for each silver ring. My husband still wears his and I keep mine in a treasure box. My ring is too big for my fingers although it could be a special toe ring for the big toe only though. I love that ring and its a reminder of what he saw in me. As a photographer and at one point an ordained minister I've seen my share of weddings but I never saw a man more in love with his bride. At the Chatham County court house with a secretary and the custodian as our witnesses. No one we personally knew was a part of it. No maid of honors, bachelor parties or girls gone wild. No tossing of the bouquet or champagne toasts.

Many times we have thought about recreating the "real" wedding. A wedding with the pretty pictures where friends and families gather like the ones that I have photographed. A wedding to show those that doubted our love the dedication we have for each other and to our family. But something about marrying my southern boy in a courthouse while knocked up not a soul around to judge us made it very real. When he said his vows to me there was no ambivalence and such randomness can't be recreated...

Happy midweek peeps... Stay Sweet!

time travel…

Sometimes you have to travel backwards... all the way back to its beginning to be able to see the future. At least that thought kept running through my head since my last post.  This week has been filled with so many emotions and traveling my little city which is always so full of potential and unimaginable promise keeps me on my toes.  

Forgetting my city hosts fireworks on it's river every first Friday of the month brings that sense of... 
Oh, I am so lucky to be right here right now... and I begin to imagine that the fireworks are all just for me... For being brave enough to drive downtown all alone and grab dinner and celebrate with who-else but myself. On a Friday night when everyone is coupled and all the other tables are filled with quintessential girls night out... I toast, wish and hope for myself...



Yes, the realization that your own company is at times all your soul needs deserves fireworks at least in my world.



We can travel anywhere even in time if we really want to. The sights and sounds of medieval Scotland  at Savannah's Scottish games is filled with such strong testosterone driven energy even though the men wear plaid skirts  beautiful kilts and lots of shiny buckles…



 
I learned Haggis and Hagrid are two complete different things… Yes, Hagrid is magical and Haggis is not so much. 


 


Later in the day Scotland puts me on a trance and that is when it shows its true colors … through its art, dance, music and sportsmanship… and now I know by going back and learning your history I can honestly say…






Scotland, I love you and I want to wash upon your shores… you are beautiful and sweet even when you cook the Haggis.





When you are meeting friends for a sunset dinner by the sea and your restaurant is across the travelling state fair of such meeting be ready and take a chance walk through even if you don’t climb aboard any of its rides just take a moment to breath it in…





Beauty is everywhere…







After dinner we went to listen to some surf punk watching my friend Alex slappin’ the upright bass… she is such a rockstar… love it when girls really and truly kick butt… because they are strong and true to themselves…and that is so beautiful…



Mother’s Day came along and I spent the day surrounded by a group of friends and family… no pictures were taken. Sometimes there are events where no images are taken because of that which transpires is so beautiful, unspoken and private that only the memories serve as the true witness of what really happened…. and like a secret society those moments and stories are never told or shared with anyone other than those who were there present…


My hands looked liked as if I was missing 3 of my 5 fingers so I placed the camera on my hand 


Now and today I celebrate Casey… On a May 9th exactly 11 years ago we wed…



Love thank you...



Here's to at least 40 more...




Have an amazing week Peeps...